


Suffocating

by sleepingguard01



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Ficlet, Grief/Mourning, I was never going to finish this so I'm posting it now, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Protectiveness, Regret, SBI Family Dynamic, Tommy's dead lol, i am in physical pAin, let's pretend ghosts aren't a thing on the smp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:00:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28536297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepingguard01/pseuds/sleepingguard01
Summary: “Techno, no- I… I refuse to let you go,” Phil’s voice got stronger, firmer. Like he was telling Techno to stop eating cookies before dinner.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 100





	Suffocating

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time posting fan fiction of any sort on any website, so be patient with me please! This was based off a conversation with my friend Kaiser, which resulted in us both writing stuff for this scenario, and while his is more complete (and probably more coherent) I doubt he'll ever post it.
> 
> Anyway Dadza pog, obviously about their rp personas, but I think I should say that anyway.

Tommy was dead.

Phil blamed himself in many ways- He could’ve visited. Supported Tommy. Talked to Dream. Or Tubbo. Work something out. Tommy was his son, goddamnit, he should’ve tried more for him. But he didn’t. Phil avoided conflict, for the sake of peace and quiet, and in the process lost his youngest. He was a coward, living with his eldest son who didn’t need his protection, and for what reason? Loneliness? Favoritism? Jesus, one of his own sons perished, burned alive in lava because he thought no one was there for him, and it was true. 

Phil couldn’t be consoled for weeks. He was crying constantly. Techno was never good with comforting people- or dealing with people in general, really- but this was another level he couldn’t deal with. It wasn’t that Techno didn’t have his own grief and guilt over it all- but something was preventing him from putting those emotions into words, letting Phil know that he wasn’t alone with the burden of guilt. He just couldn’t. Eventually, Phil ran out of tears to cry, and an empty, growing sense of loss came over him, leaving him a hollow shell of himself, sitting silently in the arctic base staring at nothing in particular. Techno could manage the chores just fine by himself, so that wasn’t a concern, but it all felt so… empty. Pointless, without Phil there to bounce jokes off of. 

For the first time since he moved, Techno wished he had a battle to fight, a direction to go, to escape the guilt and anger and torment. He needed to hurt someone. Blood needed to be spilled. He needed to go.

Techno quietly assembled his armor one day, while Phil was idly staring out the window. Techno draped his cloak over himself, straightening the red fabric. Phil looked up upon noticing his son’s movement.

“Where are you going, Techno? Out to collect something?” Phil said quietly. His voice was rough from not speaking.

“No,” replied Techno, “I was going to go find Dream. I don’t intend to let him walk free, obviously.” 

“T- To Dream?” Phil laughed, quietly, something he did when he was nervous, “Techno, no- I… I refuse to let you go,” Phil’s voice got stronger, firmer. Like he was telling Techno to stop eating cookies before dinner. A familiar tone, yet more melancholy. 

Techno paused and blinked. “Why not?” he asked, “It’s not as if he can beat me. I’ve bested him before. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Techno, please. It’s dangerous, and a long journey, and I don’t know if I can handle everything by myself and-” Phil’s eyes were tearing up at the edges. Techno was never good with emotions, either, and he was definitely not prepared for this sort of response- Phil had always trusted him to return safely, trusting in his ability to do what he needed to do and survive, come home in one piece. This was different. Techno froze up, staring at Phil as he spat off a list of reasons not to go.

Quickly, Techno found his voice again and interrupted, “Phil. You’ll be fine on your own, why are you acting like this? I can handle myself, I’ve already got a ridiculous amount of gear-”

“No,” Phil sat up straighter, grabbing at Techno’s cloak, shocking him back into silence, “I can’t, I can’t let you leave. I- I can’t lose you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Edit on 1/18/2021: My friend finally posted his version of this scenario! Please go check it out, it’s super cool :) —> https://archiveofourown.org/works/28831437


End file.
